Truly loving a person does NOT mean unconditionally accepting whatever they do. Unconditional acceptance is not the same thing as unconditional love. If someone you love is dancing around on the train tracks with their ear phones on, and you know that train is headed for them…are you going to shrug and say nothing because they don’t hear it? Do you stand by and watch, and shake your head, hoping the train is delayed, or will go some other way? Why do people sit back and watch someone they love self destruct and say nothing because they say they love them? But it happens all the time. People just stand by and watch while the train plows that person over. Sometimes they even let that person convince them somehow that dancing on the train tracks is a good thing that will make their life better…and if there should be a train that comes (though they still say there’s probably not), it’s all meant to be.
You can’t always convince the person to get off the tracks. That’s granted. But you don’t have to stand by and watch either…and not doing so does not mean you don’t love the person. Actually, truly loving someone is being willing to tell them the truth whether they want to hear it or not…whether you think they’re going to listen or not. It is really, really hard to do that though…which is why they call it ‘tough love’.