Still the same person: Raw thoughts


I’ve aged on the outside, and I suppose will continue to do so.  That is, after all, how it goes.  But inside I’m still the same.  Oh, sure…there are things I’ve learned along the way and ways that I’ve changed through the years.  But I am basically the same person that I was when I was 25 years old.  I mean, I still feel that way inside, anyway.  And that is also how it goes.

I wrote this poem this afternoon, and hesitated to share it.  But this is “My life uncut…almost”, and there’s nothing wrong with these thoughts, though perhaps they make me blush a little, sharing them.  Sharing similar thoughts would’ve made me blush when I was 25 too, by the way. 😉

Dreaming

I long for arms around me

Arms that want to be there

Holding me

Lips that want to be pressed

Against mine

Not because I asked

I long to be looked at that way…

That way that says

I love you

You’re beautiful

Because of who you are…

Just because.

I long for love pure enough to see

Beyond the aging appearance

To see someone desirable

Because you look with your heart

Not just your eyes

Am I dreaming?

Don’t wake me up

Unless it is you.

1983

2012

Editing: I want to add…I am not looking for a relationship, nor do I want one.  Just didn’t want this post to be misunderstood to mean that.  It is just thoughts…that’s all.

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About Anne Sikes

"But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us." (2 Cor. 4:7) Sharing the journey through daily thoughts and struggles, examination of Scripture, poetry, music and art.
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17 Responses to Still the same person: Raw thoughts

  1. I don’t think that many of us do change even though we get older. As a matter of fact just the other day in the car listening to music of our generation…the 50’s I asked my husband if ..inside he felt our age now…or as if we were still young and we both agreed we did (feel younger that is)….very special poem to share…Diane

    • Anne Sikes says:

      Thank you Diane. It’s kind of a vulnerable feeling, to share these thoughts. But they’re real and honest…and very normal too. Thanks so much for your comment. How is your husband, by the way?

  2. timzauto says:

    Wow Very nice Anne …beautiful words

  3. Christine says:

    Love it! Beautiful inside and out…..
    Thank you for sharing! Even if it did cause a blush! 🙂

  4. cindyhfrench says:

    Anne, that was perfectly lovely and I so understand that feeling. Why do you think you shouldn’t have a relationship? Is God not capable of giving you someone at any stage/age of your life? You are a beautiful woman. I didn’t see a whole lot difference in the young woman and the woman you are today-however old you are-you are looking good! I know that love like you want is possible to be found in a 2nd marriage. Now I’ve had my Dennis 32 years this year but I have been loved and cherished and cared for like none other and I know it. And spoiled rotten too. But I think that God can send you love at any age if you are open to it and He believes that it will make the 2 of you stronger together than apart. That was certainly the story for us. I would have never become the woman I am today without my husband’s encouragement and help all along the way. He is as responsible for my success as I am. He doesn’t agree, but what does he know? I just don’t want you to say never! you don’t know!! and God made you and your feelings so obviously there may be a need there that He can take care of. Why don’t you ask him?
    and please excuse my butting in! I know I don’t know you well-but you write so beautifully and you have such a heart for God–I know that God made Adam and then He made Eve knowing that they needed each other.

    • Anne Sikes says:

      Thank you very much Cindy. You’re very kind. 🙂 I’ve been married twice. My first husband died in ’01. I remarried in ’06, and I’m separated from my husband now…not divorced. So I’m not free to date. And even if I was divorced and free to date, I have some alone time…just me and God before I would want to find someone else again…if I ever did. Too much pain there. So I’m just leaving it in God’s capable hands to work out the details in the meantime. And for that…I have asked more than once. 😉 And I’ll continue to do so and to just keep plugging away the best that I can in the meantime. Thanks again for your very kind comment! Blessings –Anne

      • cindyhfrench says:

        you are so welcome and again-sorry for butting in-but I see a lovely, God-loving woman and I think –no I know there are men out there who want that. but you are right it is up to God.

        • Anne Sikes says:

          You don’t have to apologize at all Cindy. I appreciate your comments, and am so happy for you that you’re happy. 🙂 And I know that with or without a man in my life, God will help me through the rest of this life. 🙂 Blessings –Anne

  5. faithfulnibbles says:

    And they are beautiful thoughts. I believe God gives women a desire to be adored, loved by a man with the agape love that Christ has for the church. Ephesians 5

  6. Portia says:

    Wait a minute! You don’t want a relationship? Yes you do! You want a relationship that is like how you described in your poem. Such a love exists and it can happen to you.

    • Anne Sikes says:

      I didn’t want this misconstrued that way, as if I’m sort of ‘advertising’ for someone or something. You’re right that I would like a relationship like the one I described…but am not ready for that for a number of reasons, and am not looking. 🙂

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